Communication Skills Training

Communication Skills Training….  Why it is Important.

You’ve probably been on a  communication course. You may have been on several …?

If the training was good then you will have reaped the benefits already. If not then you have a gap in one of the most important skills that any body can have.

Communication skills are more important than the ability to read or write, do arithmetic or anything else. The evidence for this is that several people I know who are completely illiterate are multi millionaires.

They can’t read or write but my goodness..they can talk….

The thing is this…They talk in a certain way, that gets them all of the results that they want…! Well… most of the time…

Now I’m not saying that the three R’s aren’t important because they are…!

Communication is all about exchanging information. You can receive the information or you can send it. Most people think of talking when they use the word. They think that when you  communicate it is all words.

This myth is partly responsible for a lot of the confusion that exists between people; particularly when there are conflicts ( read, “disagreements” ) between them.

They think that by talking more assertively or louder that they can sort the problems out.

Often The Problem comes back to bite them…

You see…

If you use assertiveness skills to dominate bludgeon or bully your opponent then you both lose. The other person will only cooperate with you for as little time as they can. They won’t feel good about you and if the truth be known…

you probably won’t feel too good about you either…

Nobody likes to be bullied or to be a bully…unless of course you happen to be some sort of psychopathic kitten killer….

I’ll go into this concept a bit later but first I want to go back to the ways that people receive and send information.

There’s talking and hearing which is known as auditory….

There’s seeing which is known as visual….

There is also smell and taste. Olfactory and Gustatory…

Lastly there is touch which is referred to as Kinaesthetic…

All of these senses are used by you and people like you. You’ve done it so often that it  has probably become unconscious. You’re not aware of it most times. Nor are you aware of the fact that around 87% of your communication is via your body language.

Your voice is the smallest factor in how you get your message across…

Another thing…

They say that seeing is believing….unfortunately this isn’t strictly true…

Around 2/3 of what you “see” is based on information that is already stored in your brain. The brain simply connects to the information that makes the most sense based on what comes in via the visual cortex…

Kinda scary huh…?

A good communication skills training will show you ways to be aware of the body language of others and to be able to “read” it accurately; It will teach you how to listen correctly so that you can detect what is really being said: It will give you the skills to respond in the most appropriate way in any situation…

( sometimes that may be by saying “time out ” )

Effective communication training will show you how to discover “who owns the problem” ? And quite often the answer to that question will surprise you…

It will teach you about the three types of conflict and how to deal with each one…including dealing with any anger that you may have.

Most important of all a good training will give you the tools to create the no problem areas in your life where you win and feel good and so does everyone else.

How will you know if you’ve had a great training ?

Well, you’ll be relaxed and confident…in almost any situation.

You will know how to say what you want or state your needs without getting the whole worlds back up..

You’ll be able to create trust and understanding with other people almost instantly…

You’ll probably also be happier, though that is also related to other functions of the brain so maybe take that with a pinch of salt..

You will be clear on your goals and will know how to state them so that you can create agreement with others. ( this skill is great for building teams and friendships )

There is so much more to communicating skillfully that this post could go on for several days….

Right now though I’m going to take the dog for a walk…talk to him…

tune in here regularly as this is just the start of something beautiful…

Now that could be auditory, visual, olfactory or gustatory or even kinaesthetic…